Friday, May 28, 2010

Happy Friday

So the end of the work week is here.
And its a holiday weekend. My DH told me that we are taking the kids to see Shrek 4
And he is taking me to buy a new cell. Our kids are graduating this week one from Kindergarden and one from 8th grade. Time flies. Tomorrow is my regular spanking day. He is going to try out a new ruler. I do not know how I feel about that yet, but I am sure I will have an opinion come tomorrow night. LOL. I am kind of nervous to tell you the truth. He has become a pretty talented spanker. I was reflecting this morning on my submission and I have came along way. I am proud of myself. I am not perfect but I am doing a pretty good job of surrendering to him. I love the feeling it gives me and the satisfaction of knowing that we share such a special bond. Well I hope everyone has a great HolidayWeekend

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Just my Thoughts

I have asked that my husband look at our current situation and refresh
the rules that we have in place. I feel that I have grown as a person and that some
of those rules that we have in place need to be updated. I am currently working on
becoming more organized now that he is gone 14 hours everyday. That leaves me with
more responsibility and I need order. I have never been good at organizing and I am learning
lots of new tips thanks to the internet. I also would like him to be more strict when it comes to
helping me or correcting me I should say. We are still keeping the four D's but there are some more I
think could be of great use to me. Like my time management skills and the way I procrastinate. LOL just to name a few. I like rules and structure and I also like to feel like I am owned. He does a really good job
of owning me so I really can not complain there. I have found myself remembering something that he said to me the night before and smiling or feeling that warm glow that makes me so happy to be a spanked wife.
I feel sorry for the women that have not experienced that feeling. I usually have a smile on my face knowing that we share this wonderful life. I come across women that complain and belittle their husbands and feel sorry that they will probably never feel the deep connection that I feel with my husband. It is to bad.

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Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Stress Relief

I need a spanking and as soon as my DH gets home I will ask.
I want to lose all control of the emotions and stress that I have built up
over the last few weeks. I need to feel my husbands strength and feed of his
energy. I want to be taken over the edge and brought back renewed. I can not wait for him to
get home. I will make sue that everything is done in the house and dinner is ready.
I need a good cry and I am not afraid to admit it LOL. Then I want to crawl into my husbands lap
and just be....
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Saturday, May 15, 2010

Feeling Better

Well, I have decided that it is time that I start posting again.
Also, time to start assuming the position again.
I am physically feeling eighty percent better and mentally seventy-five.
I am struggling with my feelings about my husband. The miscarriage was something that happened
to both of us, yet I can not express the way that I feel to him. It is not about the words but about my
heart. I can only hope that he will read this and maybe understand how much I love him.
He was the one that I called out for in the ultrasound room when there was no longer a heartbeat.
when they told me that I needed to go wait in the lobby for instructions he led me out the
back exit so I did not have to see anyone.
When nature took its course he gave me space without ever making
me feel like I was alone. He was my rock and he is my everything.
I can not describe this feeling that I have with words. We have not been intimate in weeks
yet he makes me feel desired everyday. And he assures me that I am going to feel like myself
again when I have doubts. He has done all this while starting a new job and commuting 2 hours each way.
He has been more than just my support system heled me out of what could have been the great depression. So, I make his lunch and smile.
I try to have his dinner ready as soon as he gets home.
I try to do extra things however small, to show him how much I appreciate him.
 I know that what he did for me that night made the difference in me "being ok" or going off the deep end. I do not think he really knows how serious I am about that. I know that I am loved and that no matter what happens if I need him he will be there. And if he needs me I would walk to the end of the earth for him. I am content knowing that he knows that. And I thank GOD for making him mine. Sorry that was a long post I know, but I still do not think I said all that I wanted to but I hope I got the general idea out. I am ready to resume DD again and will make sure that I give it 110 percent. I am so lucky.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Bad News

I just wanted to tell all of my new friends and readers that on Tuesday we lost our baby.
I went to the OB and she could not find a heartbeat.
She then sent me over for an ultrasound
and I could tell that it was bad due to the fact
that she turned the screen and then when I asked about the heartbeat she said to talk to my DR.
My doctor got the radiologist report and confirmed it.
I will post again when I am feeling better.