Feeling Better

Well, I have decided that it is time that I start posting again.
Also, time to start assuming the position again.
I am physically feeling eighty percent better and mentally seventy-five.
I am struggling with my feelings about my husband. The miscarriage was something that happened
to both of us, yet I can not express the way that I feel to him. It is not about the words but about my
heart. I can only hope that he will read this and maybe understand how much I love him.
He was the one that I called out for in the ultrasound room when there was no longer a heartbeat.
when they told me that I needed to go wait in the lobby for instructions he led me out the
back exit so I did not have to see anyone.
When nature took its course he gave me space without ever making
me feel like I was alone. He was my rock and he is my everything.
I can not describe this feeling that I have with words. We have not been intimate in weeks
yet he makes me feel desired everyday. And he assures me that I am going to feel like myself
again when I have doubts. He has done all this while starting a new job and commuting 2 hours each way.
He has been more than just my support system heled me out of what could have been the great depression. So, I make his lunch and smile.
I try to have his dinner ready as soon as he gets home.
I try to do extra things however small, to show him how much I appreciate him.
 I know that what he did for me that night made the difference in me "being ok" or going off the deep end. I do not think he really knows how serious I am about that. I know that I am loved and that no matter what happens if I need him he will be there. And if he needs me I would walk to the end of the earth for him. I am content knowing that he knows that. And I thank GOD for making him mine. Sorry that was a long post I know, but I still do not think I said all that I wanted to but I hope I got the general idea out. I am ready to resume DD again and will make sure that I give it 110 percent. I am so lucky.